The Permission Slip Nobody Gave You

Still waiting for someone to say it's okay to want more than this?

There's something you want. You've wanted it for a while, and you keep not doing it — not because you can't, but because somewhere in the back of your mind, you're still waiting for the permission slip nobody gave you – for someone to tell you it's okay.

Nobody's coming.

And that, right there, is what we need to talk about. Because waiting for permission to want more from life is the longest line most of us have ever stood in — and nobody is working that desk.

The Parking Lot We've All Sat In

Picture a woman in a parking lot. Groceries in the trunk, to-do list done. She has about four minutes before she starts the car and the day takes over again. And in those four minutes, she lets herself think about it. The thing she actually wants. The class she's been looking at online for months. The trip she's packed for in her head a hundred times. A version of her life that feels just one brave decision away.

Then she starts the car.

Maybe that was you. Maybe it's been you more times than you can count. If so, I see you — because I've been that woman too.

Here's what I want to say about that, and I say it from years of sitting with women in this exact place: the reason we don't move on to the things we want isn't usually fear, and it isn't laziness. It's that we've been waiting for permission. For someone — a partner, a friend, a therapist, honestly just the universe sometimes — to say: yes, that's allowed. You can have what you want.

That permission is never coming from the outside. Which means we have to give it to ourselves.

This is something I explored in more depth in a post about why starting now can change everything — because the thing stopping most of us isn't timing or skill. It's the quiet belief that we need to earn the right to begin.

What I Did for My Birthday (No Apologies)

A few weeks ago, I did something for my birthday that I'm not even a little embarrassed about. I wrote myself a permission slip. A real one. The kind you'd fill out for a school field trip — except instead of going to the science museum, I was giving myself permission to want things. To take up space. To say yes to my own becoming.

I actually made a free printable version of it, because some things are too good to keep to yourself. You can grab it over on our free resources page so you don't have to wait for the permission slip nobody gave you.

But here's what I want you to understand before you fill it out: it's not a motivational poster. It's not a manifesto. It's just a piece of paper where you write down what you want and then you let it be true.

No committee approval required.

Not sure where you are in all of this? That's exactly what our free reflection Where Are You In Your Becoming? was made for. Eight questions, two minutes, no wrong answers. It names where you actually are and points you toward what might help most right now.

What Actually Happens When You Say Yes

I want to be honest with you, because that's our thing here. Giving yourself permission doesn't immediately change your life. The first thing that usually happens is you feel a little uncomfortable.

You feel the want — clearly, without the armor of ‘I'm too busy' or ‘it's not the right time.' It's just sitting there looking at you like a curious puppy.

But here's what comes after that: clarity. When you stop arguing yourself out of your own desires, you get a surprisingly honest picture of what actually matters to you. And then the small steps become obvious. They were always obvious — you just weren't letting yourself see them.

One of the simplest places to start is journaling for goal setting — not to build a five-year plan, but just to sit with yourself and write it down. I want this. This is real. Let's see what's possible.

You have been taking such good care of everyone else. What would happen if you put yourself on that list?

That's what the permission slip is about. Not a whole life overhaul. Not a dramatic reinvention by next Tuesday. Just the simple, radical act of deciding your desires deserve to exist.

Grab the free printable in the description, fill it out. And if you want to do it alongside other women who are in the same gorgeous, complicated middle of things, come find us in The Thrive Hive. We are very good at showing up for each other. ☕💚